We all know it’s important to please our ladies in bed. But the enigmatic minds of women are quite unlike our own. In other words, they think about other things than just sex all the time. So, while it’s important to ensure she orgasms, it’s not the most essential thing in the world to her. Let’s face it, guys, they’re into the love thing. They want to feel like you’re actually paying attention.

To keep her from straying, let’s first take a look some of the main reasons why women may become disinterested. Inattention is probably the biggest one, and that can open the door for her to turn to someone else—usually that friend who’s waiting in the wings for you to screw up. If the only time you show a real interest in her is when you’re horny, you’re at risk of losing her. If you want to keep her, here’s a cheat sheet of things women find irresistible in men when it comes to being attentive.

1. Cooking

You must have developed one or two decent recipes during your tenure as a bachelor. Instead of taking her out to eat, or expecting her to cook for you, try showing her your mad skills in the kitchen. Even if it’s a disaster, she’ll appreciate that you cared enough to try.

2. Laughter

If you can make her laugh, you’re well on your way. And keeping a sense of humor can help get a couple through any rough patches that may arise. Most importantly, don’t take yourself too seriously.

3. Remembering key dates

If you’ve ever forgotten a birthday or anniversary, you know what I’m talking about. If you miss an important day, it’s going to hurt her—but you’re the one who’s really going to feel the pain as a result. Women can hold a grudge, so expect to be reminded of it with great regularity if you ever make this mistake. Set reminders, it’s simple.

4. Date nights

Once you’ve settled into a relationship, it can be easy to fall into a routine where your nights together are merely spent in front of the TV. And that can be fine on many nights, but don’t let it turn into a rut. Take her out every once in a while. Dinners, movies, or even just going for a walk—they love that shit.

5. Compliments

Don’t assume that she knows you think she’s beautiful, or that you appreciate everything she does. Be thoughtful enough to articulate it, and reassure her that she’s still the world to you.

6. Looking nice

I know they’re comfy as hell, but for God’s sake, reserve the sweatpants only for when you’re alone. Especially the old, stretchy ones, with all the holes in them. And maybe get a decent pair of shoes. Let her know you actually care about how you look when she’s around.

7. Trust

This is a huge one, guys, and it’s developed through a variety of deeds and behaviors. First, allow yourself to be vulnerable with her. Let down the guard you hold between you and the outside world. Let her in. You’re not perfect, and neither is she, so stop pretending. When this becomes a two-way street, honesty, respect, and loyalty will prevail without room for jealousy or suspicion.

8. Listening

Just as it’s important to be open with her, you need to be there for her—and actually pay attention—when she has something to say. When you do, you’ll be armed with those sweet little details that you can drop on her later when you want to melt her heart. Few things can make a woman lose her clothes better than proving that you were listening and that you remember.

9. Compromise

You don’t always have to win or be right, and that can be a tough one for guys to get over. You might not always see eye to eye. When that happens, it’s important not to judge. Even if you disagree, show empathy—that you understand why she feels the way she does. When she knows that you’ve at least heard her out, she’ll feel validated, respected and accepted.

10. Affection

This should be a no-brainer, but it can be a pitfall once you’ve settled into the relationship routine. Remember that she will always like to kiss, hold hands and cuddle. Unless you smell, which has inspired me to add a bonus thing she likes: good hygiene.

Do you want to know the ironic thing about all this stuff? If you give her everything from this list, she’ll actually become more likely to climax, anyway. That’s because she’ll feel more comfortable and loved with you, and that’s an excellent recipe for orgasms.

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Once you’ve shown her the attentive, kind gentleman you can be, go a step further and excite her with sex toys from TickleKitty.com:

The post 10 Things That’ll Make Her More Orgasmic first appeared on Tickle Kitty Blog.

The post 10 Things That’ll Make Her More Orgasmic appeared first on Tickle Kitty Blog.

We’re forced to give up a part of ourselves every day. We have responsibilities to meet that can consume us, both in the home and in our careers. Some of us might be shouldering more than we can bear out of devotion, selflessness, or necessity. If there is one aspect of our lives that shouldn’t be subject to the inevitabilities of life, it’s our sexual practice. Sex is one of the few activities that is completely within our control. We have a choice to examine and reclaim it for our growth, or remain confused about how it’s affecting us.

Our generation is fierce about its right to be sexual, but for some sex has become a concept more than an act. It’s about rebellion, empowerment or showing off. While sex can be a part of all those things, we should also remember that it is a powerful, beautiful, and delicate act of sharing yourself.

If you’re going to claim your sexuality as a strong pillar of your being, you don’t have to choose empty sexual encounters that are being paraded as revolutionary.

Sex isn’t just an equal rights protest; it can be part of your well-being.

Having sex isn’t always empowering, and isn’t absolutely necessary for empowerment. Sometimes people use sex to manipulate, deceive or inspire jealousy. And sometimes, even if you had good intentions, you might look back in shame or disgust at one or more of the assholes or liars you took to bed. Sex isn’t always positive for everyone who is having it. It can be damaging to our emotional health if we’re reckless.

Refraining from the wrong kind of sex isn’t about avoiding the outdated “bad girl” or the “neighborhood slut” stereotypes—because not all sex is the “wrong” kind of sex. Instead, it’s about steering clear of sex that doesn’t enrich us because we want to take care of our emotional selves and fulfill our real desires.

Don’t choose to skip sex because you might be called a “skank” or other vapid derogatory name. Skip sex because someone doesn’t share the understanding, appreciation, and respect that’s necessary between sexual partners.

If you’re having sex with someone that makes you feel anything less than amazing before, during, and after the bedroom, that person doesn’t deserve you.

We’re lucky to live in a time when so many believe in fighting for our right to judgement-free sex, but if taken to lightly, sex loses all meaning and depth. It’s easy to say “Hey, it’s just sex!” as we try to banish slut-shaming and double standards. It almost seems like a step backward if we admit just how sensitive we are during one of the most vulnerable acts between two humans.

Sex still affects us no matter how serious or casual the encounter. Having sex with another living, breathing body is a powerful thing.

It’s often wrought with intense emotion whether we want it to be or not. Simply put, sex is far too important for our health to have it with the wrong person. If you’re only lusting after someone because they’re physically attractive (and maybe you’re a little bit drunk), think carefully. Whether you’ve known them for years or just a night, make sure the person you’re with is someone with whom you can share mutual respect, if not love.

If someone doesn’t nourish your sexual soul, banish them like a bad habit. There’s no shame – in fact, you can use it to celebrate your own agency – in your ability to give them a firm, point-blank “No.”

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Now that you’ve kicked that bozo (or lady-creep) at the bar to the curb, you can get down with someone who you know loves and respects you. Yourself!

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The post Cherishing Your Body and Saying “No” to Sex first appeared on Tickle Kitty Blog.

The post Cherishing Your Body and Saying “No” to Sex appeared first on Tickle Kitty Blog.