“Fake it ‘til you make it” may work for climbing career ladders, but when it comes to the world of sex, it couldn’t be a bigger faux pas. And even though women are often the ones who get credit for honing the art of faking orgasms, rumor has it they’re apparently not alone.
Each year SKYN Condoms conducts their annual Millennial Sex Survey, which this time around revealed about 63% of females admit to having faked an orgasm at one point or another. So while that may not necessarily come as the biggest surprise—a whopping 43% of males confessed the same.
Luckily most of the responders said they’ve only done so on a “rarely to never” basis, but it still begs the only real question in need of asking…
While most probably agree there’s never a good reason to fake an orgasm, there are plenty of reasons why some (especially women) may feel the need.
Many females need on average almost four times longer than males to reach their climactic potential—this is known as the infamous orgasm gap. So depending on how long your sexy festivities tend to last, some may find it awkward that some aren’t wired to finish as quickly as others…and therefore might resort to wrapping things up in whatever way they can.
Plus, if it’s just vaginal penetration we’re talking, as many as 70-80% of gals have trouble reaching climax from that kind of sex alone in the first place. With so many different types of orgasms, it’s no wonder we can’t be masters of them all. So if the amount of foreplay and other pre-game action isn’t sufficient, it should be pretty obvious why actually crossing the finish may not be so attainable.
So what about men?
Now, even though plenty of people wouldn’t think the embellishment ball would ever fall into the court of guys as well, a lot of their potential reasons aren’t actually all that different.
Regardless of gender, everyone has a unique sexual drive. And just like with any other sexual beings in this world, anxiety always has the potential to interfere with our performance abilities. So whether it’s being nervous about what the other person is thinking, or any other stress tied into the circumstances, men are just as apt to get tense about reaching orgasm, which only makes the process harder.
But what else that can play a part in the male façade specifically, is the stereotype of guys being ready for all the sex, all the time—which simply isn’t true.
We previously covered that no two libidos are exactly alike, which definitely applies to men. Unfortunately, some guys still feel the need to live up to ever-present notions of “masculinity,” and that (somehow) translates to the ability to orgasm within a handful of minutes. So regardless if they’re actually able to, the need to act like climax has been reached can become more important than the act itself.
Leave The Acting Behind
So even though several cases can be made for a need to feign the big “O”, the fact of the matter is an orgasm doesn’t define the quality or degree of pleasure felt in an experience to begin with.
Sex, as always, is about the satisfaction and pleasure shared in and of itself—not the single notion of whether or not one (or both) ends up climaxing. And by falling into a trap of consistently faking the finale, you’re all the more likely to just wind up in an intricate web of underwhelming sexual lies.
And seriously, who wants that?
Orgasm Aides To The Rescue!
But when all is said and done, the good news is there are several tips and tricks that can help everyone orgasm more on their own accord! Including…
Masturbation: Simply talking to your partner about what feels good for both of you is always the first and foremost step to heightened pleasure. So more frequently masturbating can be the perfect key to discovering what those suggestions are in the first place.
Toys: Whether it’s just you or a partner too, there’s a perfect toy for every occasion. Once again, it’s typically women that get associated with using toys. But our dirty little not so secret is they’re just as effective, plentiful and pleasure-inducing for guys as well.
Lube: And what could make things more comfortable, enjoyable and orgasmic above all than our nightstand’s main squeeze—lube! Regardless if playing around with a partner or just a toy alone, lube has a unique way of boosting sensations. And with so many different kinds on the market nowadays, you never know what kind of intimate thrills you may uncover.
So before you find yourself saying SOS from being SOL in the epic games of faking an orgasm, just remember sex isn’t defined by if and when you climax, but the pleasure felt overall. Orgasming isn’t the only way to feel “satisfied”, nor an indication of how enjoyable a session between the sheets happened to be. So instead of feeling overwhelmed with insecurity or paranoia about whether or not you’re acting enough like a porn star, be a pal to you and your partner both and spare the theatrics for another time.
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